Noa had fallen and dislocated her left hind joint...
Breaks my heart as she howled in pain...
Breaks my soul when the option of
(1) putting her under for a long surgery...
(2) or under enough anesthesia to pop it back in place...
(3) or leave her be so her dislocated joint will have to bear a long process of pain to fit in its off-position in which she'll end up having an awkward leg to move around or snuggle herself in...
Problem with (1), there's a high risk of putting a dog her age under g.a. It compromises her organs and she might not wake. It will be a long tedious surgery.
Problem with (2), as with (1), except she'll be under for like an hour or so. The vet also emphasized that this option has the highest failure rate. Her bones are getting old and her socket is shallow. Which means, it may pop out of position again. We could repeat this process many times, which means the risk when she goes under every time.
Problem with (3), we find it hard to deal with the fact that she will be in pain until she gets used to the fact that her joint will never be in position ever again.
We needed an option that fixes her pain fast. She couldn't stand and cries when she tried to move. So we decided on (2). Put her leg back into position, and thus, began our prayers.
Tears of relief when I got the call from the hospital and said that Noa is up and we can pick her up.
It's only been 10 hours since we brought her home. She's restless, but doing well. Bet she feels real awkward with her fixed leg bound. She's not allowed to move it for awhile.
She's being so brave for us and we're so proud of her.
What I didn't appreciate was the condescending condolences.
We REALIZED Noa cannot be allowed to jump anymore. No couch. No bed. No curbs.
We DEFINITELY will not let her go up on the shoe cabinet (where she must have fallen from) no more. She loves the spot. She'd sit on top and look out the window. Many times she'll get up there, sit and watch the world go by or cats roaming about.
We beat ourselves up enough for this to even happen, so OBVIOUSLY, having her joint dislocated is a "well received" wake up call.
We're not clueless.
So if you haven't got anything nice to say, just shut up and pray.
Monday, November 29, 2010
Friday, November 26, 2010
He's Just Not That Into You / Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows Part 1 / My Thinking Space
What is your current profession and how did you choose your career path (where did you study, learn, become inspired)?
I'm a housewife, for about 4 months now. It was a difficult decision, coming from a feminist working era, in this country at least. Almost everyone I know of my age are out there making a namesake for themselves. Earning the bucks. I have not had the smoothest career path I must say. But I did enjoy some of those times clocking in 9 to 6, waitressing, zookeeping, show presenting, vet assisting, teaching, hospitality marketing.
I graduated with a Diploma in a major I did not learn to appreciate at all. I didn't have the brains for it and I'm fine with that.
I learn mainly from life experiences. The heart breaks, the politics, the passion for certain details, music, movies, people I've crossed paths with.
My husband inspires me. He's smart, geeky and has a very high tolerance for my sometimes dramatic idealism/fascism. He is currently pursuing his PHD and we have Noa, a Shiba Inu. We love her so much but she's been having this skin problems that doesn't seem to be going away as quickly as we would like it to be. I couldn't handle work (from my last job) because I was worrying endlessly about her condition (she would scratch and bite herself sore, add on political issues at work) and I'm extremely anal about having things done a certain way at home. Things were just getting too much to handle so I decided to let one thing go; my job. And now I focus on taking care of the house, the husband and Noa. It's been working out. I'm reading more. Gaining perspectives, always a good thing.
Where did you grow up? How did it influence who you are today?
I grew up here in Singapore, born Malaysian. I get to see how living on both sides of the counties is like. I must say, I am luckier than I thought. I got the better part of education (more like advanced than better I'd say) and security here. I get to live a stress free life when I visit my relatives back in Malaysia, where the farm animals roam and people leading a slower pace. But I'd much rather a more open space where there's no shoving, no lousy public behaviors, dog friendly, nature loving place. Coming from where I am, I've learned to appreciate all those things when the universe presents it. Even in this small, uptight country.
What are you passionate about?
Photography, playing house mistress, learning the world, the urge to psycho analyse people.
What was the last thing that made you laugh?
My geeky husband.
Why have you chosen this as your thinking space?
There's always all sorts of thoughts going through in my mind and sometimes, it's better left unsaid, and blog.
I'm a housewife, for about 4 months now. It was a difficult decision, coming from a feminist working era, in this country at least. Almost everyone I know of my age are out there making a namesake for themselves. Earning the bucks. I have not had the smoothest career path I must say. But I did enjoy some of those times clocking in 9 to 6, waitressing, zookeeping, show presenting, vet assisting, teaching, hospitality marketing.
I graduated with a Diploma in a major I did not learn to appreciate at all. I didn't have the brains for it and I'm fine with that.
I learn mainly from life experiences. The heart breaks, the politics, the passion for certain details, music, movies, people I've crossed paths with.
My husband inspires me. He's smart, geeky and has a very high tolerance for my sometimes dramatic idealism/fascism. He is currently pursuing his PHD and we have Noa, a Shiba Inu. We love her so much but she's been having this skin problems that doesn't seem to be going away as quickly as we would like it to be. I couldn't handle work (from my last job) because I was worrying endlessly about her condition (she would scratch and bite herself sore, add on political issues at work) and I'm extremely anal about having things done a certain way at home. Things were just getting too much to handle so I decided to let one thing go; my job. And now I focus on taking care of the house, the husband and Noa. It's been working out. I'm reading more. Gaining perspectives, always a good thing.
Where did you grow up? How did it influence who you are today?
I grew up here in Singapore, born Malaysian. I get to see how living on both sides of the counties is like. I must say, I am luckier than I thought. I got the better part of education (more like advanced than better I'd say) and security here. I get to live a stress free life when I visit my relatives back in Malaysia, where the farm animals roam and people leading a slower pace. But I'd much rather a more open space where there's no shoving, no lousy public behaviors, dog friendly, nature loving place. Coming from where I am, I've learned to appreciate all those things when the universe presents it. Even in this small, uptight country.
What are you passionate about?
Photography, playing house mistress, learning the world, the urge to psycho analyse people.
What was the last thing that made you laugh?
My geeky husband.
Why have you chosen this as your thinking space?
There's always all sorts of thoughts going through in my mind and sometimes, it's better left unsaid, and blog.
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo / Greenzone / Ghost Town
After seeing how life can be a lot worst, I feel like the smallest person on Earth. Especially right before that, I was just bitching away about some petty shit. The same old crap which I should already have put it behind me.
As if fighting politically isn't enough. I may have just finally put the pettiness to rest. I'll probably regress. I'm just gonna have to remember to tell myself that there are bigger problems out there. Real huge.
People being used as pawns in their political games (gains) is just sick. That's on a bigger scale, like governing. Going to war and stuff.
On a smaller scale, I know the only reason why some families are civilize with each other, because they NEED each other. Always having a 'gracious' excuse at the back of their plotting minds. Always with the family ties for any obligations. The guilt trips. Vicious.
Oh look at me regressing already.
For goodness's sake, can be a pretty convenient of an excuse.
'Only a life lived for others is a life worthwhile.' - Albert Einstein
I just prayed for all whom I love and loves me.
As if fighting politically isn't enough. I may have just finally put the pettiness to rest. I'll probably regress. I'm just gonna have to remember to tell myself that there are bigger problems out there. Real huge.
People being used as pawns in their political games (gains) is just sick. That's on a bigger scale, like governing. Going to war and stuff.
On a smaller scale, I know the only reason why some families are civilize with each other, because they NEED each other. Always having a 'gracious' excuse at the back of their plotting minds. Always with the family ties for any obligations. The guilt trips. Vicious.
Oh look at me regressing already.
For goodness's sake, can be a pretty convenient of an excuse.
'Only a life lived for others is a life worthwhile.' - Albert Einstein
I just prayed for all whom I love and loves me.
Saturday, November 20, 2010
Due Date / Zombieland
Yea the geeky charm's still got it's thing on me...
AND I so love the gay thing that people do. It's just so dramatic and fun!
And I THINK... I think... I'm learning the tricks of being all... zen. Well except for a recent after-funeral trip which tripped the mother in law out for abit. And the eye-balling of an excuse of the funeral trip. Ok not quite zen there but I'm always gonna be working on it.
AND I so love the gay thing that people do. It's just so dramatic and fun!
And I THINK... I think... I'm learning the tricks of being all... zen. Well except for a recent after-funeral trip which tripped the mother in law out for abit. And the eye-balling of an excuse of the funeral trip. Ok not quite zen there but I'm always gonna be working on it.
Wednesday, November 03, 2010
Paranormal Activity 2 / Social Network
The dreaded wedding is over. I must have said that (out loud or not) so many times because I'm starting to get on my own nerves. So I made a silent promise to myself and the husband that I shall not bad mouth about it anymore. They shall not exist.
I am however very excited about the sister's wedding this weekend. The relatives will be arriving in a couple of days. Excite excite.
And I like geeks.
I am however very excited about the sister's wedding this weekend. The relatives will be arriving in a couple of days. Excite excite.
And I like geeks.
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Ratatouille / Vicky Cristina Barcelona
I've watched Ratatouille so many times but it never fails to bring back the sparkles.
I'd like to inspire and instill understanding, honesty, love, peace and harmony amongst humanity. It sounds too grand a scale but I'm thinking more like paying it forward.
I know it starts with me and I'm still working on it.
I've come to accept a few things I couldn't before. The understanding of not really able to accept certain attitudes (if in my case) and that for others, it's just basically a different life and choice or even timing.
I hate myself less every time I hear myself spouting un-pleasantries in my head when certain behaviour gets on my nerves.
I've come to like having some privacy on these thoughts.
I'd like to inspire and instill understanding, honesty, love, peace and harmony amongst humanity. It sounds too grand a scale but I'm thinking more like paying it forward.
I know it starts with me and I'm still working on it.
I've come to accept a few things I couldn't before. The understanding of not really able to accept certain attitudes (if in my case) and that for others, it's just basically a different life and choice or even timing.
I hate myself less every time I hear myself spouting un-pleasantries in my head when certain behaviour gets on my nerves.
I've come to like having some privacy on these thoughts.
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Bodyguards & Assassins / Coco before Chanel / The Town
Feudalism. Revolution. Communism. Democracy. Politics.
It's necessary. Unavoidable. But can't they just do it like, gently?
Evolution worked out just fine only at a natural rate.
We're no Titans and I think Mother Nature has proven that size does matter.
I think ideas are meant to enlighten rather than influence.
I'd rather understand than blindly take sides just cos it seems to suit better. I hate that I'm still guilty of the latter. Cos trying to understand isn't easy.
Sigh... always with the easy way out...
How 'bout that selfless good deed. Does pretending to agree with the mother in law counts as a selfless good deed? It burns me up to oblige since I'm so stubbornly opinionated. And if I just went along it makes at least one person happy. But then again, it's not exactly selfless cos I'd be keeping trouble away, for myself, which should make me feel, good...?
Joey Tribianni's right. There is no such thing as a selfless good deed and I'm okay with that.
It's necessary. Unavoidable. But can't they just do it like, gently?
Evolution worked out just fine only at a natural rate.
We're no Titans and I think Mother Nature has proven that size does matter.
I think ideas are meant to enlighten rather than influence.
I'd rather understand than blindly take sides just cos it seems to suit better. I hate that I'm still guilty of the latter. Cos trying to understand isn't easy.
Sigh... always with the easy way out...
How 'bout that selfless good deed. Does pretending to agree with the mother in law counts as a selfless good deed? It burns me up to oblige since I'm so stubbornly opinionated. And if I just went along it makes at least one person happy. But then again, it's not exactly selfless cos I'd be keeping trouble away, for myself, which should make me feel, good...?
Joey Tribianni's right. There is no such thing as a selfless good deed and I'm okay with that.
Friday, October 22, 2010
From Dusk to Dawn / Detective Dee / The Legend of Chen Zhen / Shutter Island / Outrage / some samurai japanese movie
I've been a full time housewife for about 3 months now. I must say, I'm getting the hang of it. Although not quite on the routine. Then again routines never really worked for me. So I just go with the flow. And setting the discipline in motion as well. My sleeping hours are just not normal enough.
I won't say I'm the best, yet. Still working on those cooking skill. The cleaning though, is my forte.
So I haven't been the best of moods in between, but I figured it's usually like this when you're trying to figure something out... All the thinking about whether I've made the right decisions... thus affecting my confidence, my central of gravity, my good conscious & subconscious... I was mental.
And also while in the midst of all these chaos, I was completely aware of how supportive Starfish has been. From the mood swings to the tantrums to selfishly asking for time out and taking me to that restaurant which I had cravings for that juicy, juicy steak and I was convinced it would swing my mood the other way... which we didn't get to go by the way because of well, my mood swings.
His patience made me grow up a little every day... I feel precious...
I am the luckiest bitch ever.
There's also the sister's wedding to prepare for. We were running errands as and when. Getting all the props ready. Praying to Mother Jesus Mary for the best, really. And happy to say, that all's gooooood!
I also had one of the best birthday. A treat from the mei mei; Universal Studio. Receiving birthday wishes from those closest to heart and mail from the bestie, a Chomel cystal crucifix & flower and a laundry basket I've been eyeing on. I'm easy to please.
Yes these are the things that matters; love & happiness...
Blessed be, my loves.
I won't say I'm the best, yet. Still working on those cooking skill. The cleaning though, is my forte.
So I haven't been the best of moods in between, but I figured it's usually like this when you're trying to figure something out... All the thinking about whether I've made the right decisions... thus affecting my confidence, my central of gravity, my good conscious & subconscious... I was mental.
And also while in the midst of all these chaos, I was completely aware of how supportive Starfish has been. From the mood swings to the tantrums to selfishly asking for time out and taking me to that restaurant which I had cravings for that juicy, juicy steak and I was convinced it would swing my mood the other way... which we didn't get to go by the way because of well, my mood swings.
His patience made me grow up a little every day... I feel precious...
I am the luckiest bitch ever.
There's also the sister's wedding to prepare for. We were running errands as and when. Getting all the props ready. Praying to Mother Jesus Mary for the best, really. And happy to say, that all's gooooood!
I also had one of the best birthday. A treat from the mei mei; Universal Studio. Receiving birthday wishes from those closest to heart and mail from the bestie, a Chomel cystal crucifix & flower and a laundry basket I've been eyeing on. I'm easy to please.
Yes these are the things that matters; love & happiness...
Blessed be, my loves.
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Snatch
I may have just learned to shut up.
I've been in such terrible mood swinging phase its pissing me off.
Recently I've been praying.
Praying for the strength. Praying for more strength. Praying for ultimate strength for others.
I haven't prayed so much for such a long while.
I dunno if my bloated stomach's been affected because of the whole negative aura that's been conjuring around/within me.
Sigh this is depressing. How like that.
How. Like. That.
I NEED TO FIGHT THE DEMON IN ME.
I've been in such terrible mood swinging phase its pissing me off.
Recently I've been praying.
Praying for the strength. Praying for more strength. Praying for ultimate strength for others.
I haven't prayed so much for such a long while.
I dunno if my bloated stomach's been affected because of the whole negative aura that's been conjuring around/within me.
Sigh this is depressing. How like that.
How. Like. That.
I NEED TO FIGHT THE DEMON IN ME.
Thursday, September 16, 2010
Resident Evil: After Life
There's the routine which I never got routed into.
There's the bitch in me I could never get used to.
There's the idealist in me whom I haven't got in touch with.
There's the siren in me I've yet to release.
There's so much more to know when I thought I knew enough.
******************************************************
System of a Down - Toxicity
Conversion, software version 7.0
Looking at life through the eyes of a tire hub
Eating seeds is a past time activity
The toxicity of our city, of our city
No, what do you own the world?
How do you own disorder, disorder
Now somewhere between the sacred silence
Sacred silence and sleep
Somewhere, between the sacred silence and sleep
Disorder, disorder, disorder
More wood for the fires, loud neighbours
Flashlight reveries caught in the headlights of a truck
Eating seeds is a past time activity
The toxicity of our city, our city
No, what do you own the world?
How do you own disorder, disorder
Now somewhere between the sacred silence
Sacred silence and sleep
Somewhere between the sacred silence and sleep
Disorder, disorder, disorder
No, what do you own the world?
How do do you own disorder
Now somehwere between the sacred silence
Sacred silence and sleep
Somewhere, between the sacred silence and sleep
Disorder, disorder, disorder
When I became the sun
I shone life into the mans' hearts
When I became the sun
I shone life into the mans' hearts
******************************************************
There's the bitch in me I could never get used to.
There's the idealist in me whom I haven't got in touch with.
There's the siren in me I've yet to release.
There's so much more to know when I thought I knew enough.
******************************************************
System of a Down - Toxicity
Conversion, software version 7.0
Looking at life through the eyes of a tire hub
Eating seeds is a past time activity
The toxicity of our city, of our city
No, what do you own the world?
How do you own disorder, disorder
Now somewhere between the sacred silence
Sacred silence and sleep
Somewhere, between the sacred silence and sleep
Disorder, disorder, disorder
More wood for the fires, loud neighbours
Flashlight reveries caught in the headlights of a truck
Eating seeds is a past time activity
The toxicity of our city, our city
No, what do you own the world?
How do you own disorder, disorder
Now somewhere between the sacred silence
Sacred silence and sleep
Somewhere between the sacred silence and sleep
Disorder, disorder, disorder
No, what do you own the world?
How do do you own disorder
Now somehwere between the sacred silence
Sacred silence and sleep
Somewhere, between the sacred silence and sleep
Disorder, disorder, disorder
When I became the sun
I shone life into the mans' hearts
When I became the sun
I shone life into the mans' hearts
******************************************************
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
The Expendables
I didn't know I'd have such crush on action men.
**********************************
Eminem ft Rihanna - Love the way you lie
Just gonna stand there
And watch me burn
But that's alright
Because I like
The way it hurts
Just gonna stand there
And hear me cry
But that's alright
Because I love
The way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie
I can't tell you what it really is
I can only tell you what it feels like
And right now there's a steel knife
In my windpipe
I can't breathe
But I still fight
While I can fight
As long as the wrong feels right
It's like I'm in flight
High of a love
Drunk from the hate
It's like I'm huffing paint
And I love it the more that I suffer
I sufficate
And right before im about to drown
She resuscitates me
She fucking hates me
And I love it
Wait
Where you going
I'm leaving you
No you ain't
Come back
We're running right back
Here we go again
It's so insane
Cause when it's going good
It's going great
I'm Superman
With the wind in his bag
She's Lois Lane
But when it's bad
It's awful
I feel so ashamed
I snap
Who's that dude
I don't even know his name
I laid hands on her
I'll never stoop so low again
I guess I don't know my own strength
Just gonna stand there
And watch me burn
But that's alright
Because I like
The way it hurts
Just gonna stand there
And hear me cry
But that's alright
Because I love
The way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie
You ever love somebody so much
You can barely breathe
When you're with them
You meet
And neither one of you
Even know what hit 'em
Got that warm fuzzy feeling
Yeah them chills
Used to get 'em
Now you're getting fucking sick
Of looking at 'em
You swore you've never hit 'em
Never do nothing to hurt 'em
Now you're in each other's face
Spewing venom
And these words
When you spit 'em
You push
Pull each other's hair
Scratch, claw, bit 'em
Throw 'em down
Pin 'em
So lost in the moments
When you're in 'em
It's the rage that took over
It controls you both
So they say it's best
To go your separate ways
Guess that they don't know ya
Cause today
That was yesterday
Yesterday is over
It's a different day
Sound like broken records
Playin' over
But you promised her
Next time you'll show restraint
You don't get another chance
Life is no Nintendo game
But you lied again
Now you get to watch her leave
Out the window
Guess that's why they call it window pane
Just gonna stand there
And watch me burn
But that's alright
Because I like
The way it hurts
Just gonna stand there
And hear me cry
But that's alright
Because I love
The way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie
Now I know we said things
Did things
That we didn't mean
And we fall back
Into the same patterns
Same routine
But your temper's just as bad
As mine is
You're the same as me
But when it comes to love
You're just as blinded
Baby please come back
It wasn't you
Baby it was me
Maybe our relationship
Isn't as crazy as it seems
Maybe that's what happens
When a tornado meets a volcano
All I know is
I love you too much
To walk away though
Come inside
Pick up your bags off the sidewalk
Don't you hear sincerity
In my voice when I talk
Told you this is my fault
Look me in the eyeball
Next time I'm pissed
I'll aim my fist
At the dry wall
Next time
There will be no next time
I apologize
Even though I know it's lies
I'm tired of the games
I just want her back
I know I'm a liar
If she ever tries to fucking leave again
I'mma tie her to the bed
And set the house on fire
Just gonna stand there
And watch me burn
But that's alright
Because I like
The way it hurts
Just gonna stand there
And hear me cry
But that's alright
Because I love
The way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie
***********************************
**********************************
Eminem ft Rihanna - Love the way you lie
Just gonna stand there
And watch me burn
But that's alright
Because I like
The way it hurts
Just gonna stand there
And hear me cry
But that's alright
Because I love
The way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie
I can't tell you what it really is
I can only tell you what it feels like
And right now there's a steel knife
In my windpipe
I can't breathe
But I still fight
While I can fight
As long as the wrong feels right
It's like I'm in flight
High of a love
Drunk from the hate
It's like I'm huffing paint
And I love it the more that I suffer
I sufficate
And right before im about to drown
She resuscitates me
She fucking hates me
And I love it
Wait
Where you going
I'm leaving you
No you ain't
Come back
We're running right back
Here we go again
It's so insane
Cause when it's going good
It's going great
I'm Superman
With the wind in his bag
She's Lois Lane
But when it's bad
It's awful
I feel so ashamed
I snap
Who's that dude
I don't even know his name
I laid hands on her
I'll never stoop so low again
I guess I don't know my own strength
Just gonna stand there
And watch me burn
But that's alright
Because I like
The way it hurts
Just gonna stand there
And hear me cry
But that's alright
Because I love
The way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie
You ever love somebody so much
You can barely breathe
When you're with them
You meet
And neither one of you
Even know what hit 'em
Got that warm fuzzy feeling
Yeah them chills
Used to get 'em
Now you're getting fucking sick
Of looking at 'em
You swore you've never hit 'em
Never do nothing to hurt 'em
Now you're in each other's face
Spewing venom
And these words
When you spit 'em
You push
Pull each other's hair
Scratch, claw, bit 'em
Throw 'em down
Pin 'em
So lost in the moments
When you're in 'em
It's the rage that took over
It controls you both
So they say it's best
To go your separate ways
Guess that they don't know ya
Cause today
That was yesterday
Yesterday is over
It's a different day
Sound like broken records
Playin' over
But you promised her
Next time you'll show restraint
You don't get another chance
Life is no Nintendo game
But you lied again
Now you get to watch her leave
Out the window
Guess that's why they call it window pane
Just gonna stand there
And watch me burn
But that's alright
Because I like
The way it hurts
Just gonna stand there
And hear me cry
But that's alright
Because I love
The way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie
Now I know we said things
Did things
That we didn't mean
And we fall back
Into the same patterns
Same routine
But your temper's just as bad
As mine is
You're the same as me
But when it comes to love
You're just as blinded
Baby please come back
It wasn't you
Baby it was me
Maybe our relationship
Isn't as crazy as it seems
Maybe that's what happens
When a tornado meets a volcano
All I know is
I love you too much
To walk away though
Come inside
Pick up your bags off the sidewalk
Don't you hear sincerity
In my voice when I talk
Told you this is my fault
Look me in the eyeball
Next time I'm pissed
I'll aim my fist
At the dry wall
Next time
There will be no next time
I apologize
Even though I know it's lies
I'm tired of the games
I just want her back
I know I'm a liar
If she ever tries to fucking leave again
I'mma tie her to the bed
And set the house on fire
Just gonna stand there
And watch me burn
But that's alright
Because I like
The way it hurts
Just gonna stand there
And hear me cry
But that's alright
Because I love
The way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie
***********************************
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
SALT
She's as beautiful as ever and August Diehl, the inglorious bastard kind I like.
Evelyn Salt & Mike Krause's love was like Beth Orton's and William Orbit's own version of Dice...
Tough love...
******************************
Beth Orton - Roll The Dice
She said I put a spell on you
He said there's nothing I could do
And I wouldn't love the way I do since I began losing you
And nothing can compare to when you roll the dice
And you swaer your love's for me
And she doesn't know if she can keep it together forever
She said I only wanted to possess you
It's dangerous
He said I only try to impress you
It's strangeness
And I wouldn't love the way I do
If I didn't know it was true
And I'd never love the way I do since I began losing you
Nothing can compare to when you roll the dice
And you swear your love's for me
And she don't know if she can keep it together forever
And nothing can compare to when you roll the dice and you swear your love's for me
And she don't know if she can keep it together forever...
******************************
William Orbit - Dice
I was crying over you
I am smiling I think of you
Where your gardens have no walls
Breathe in the air if you care, you compare, don't say farewell
Nothing can compare to when you roll the dice and you swear your love's for me
Nothing can compare to when you roll the dice and you swear your love's for me
I was crying over you
I am smiling I think of you
Misty mornings and water falls
Breathe in the air if you care, you compare, don't say farewell
Nothing can compare to when you roll the dice and you swear your love's for me
Nothing can compare to when you roll the dice and you swear your love's for me
Virtuous sensibility
Escape velocity
Nothing can compare to when you roll the dice and you swear your love's for me
Nothing can compare to when you roll the dice and you swear your love's for me
Breathe in the air if you care, you compare, don't say farewell...
******************************
2 very sweet & gentle girls approached and invited me to join their bible study group so they can share how meaningful life is.
We have a soul and life doesn't just end here, she said...
I said I'm okay & thanked them for sharing.
I couldn't even begin to explain what I have fathom since I became aware...
Or rather, since the idea of Jesus who died on the the cross, didn't.
I figured it's not in my place to judge but I do have the sneaky habit of hitting where it might hurt.
Or so I think...
Evelyn Salt & Mike Krause's love was like Beth Orton's and William Orbit's own version of Dice...
Tough love...
******************************
Beth Orton - Roll The Dice
She said I put a spell on you
He said there's nothing I could do
And I wouldn't love the way I do since I began losing you
And nothing can compare to when you roll the dice
And you swaer your love's for me
And she doesn't know if she can keep it together forever
She said I only wanted to possess you
It's dangerous
He said I only try to impress you
It's strangeness
And I wouldn't love the way I do
If I didn't know it was true
And I'd never love the way I do since I began losing you
Nothing can compare to when you roll the dice
And you swear your love's for me
And she don't know if she can keep it together forever
And nothing can compare to when you roll the dice and you swear your love's for me
And she don't know if she can keep it together forever...
******************************
William Orbit - Dice
I was crying over you
I am smiling I think of you
Where your gardens have no walls
Breathe in the air if you care, you compare, don't say farewell
Nothing can compare to when you roll the dice and you swear your love's for me
Nothing can compare to when you roll the dice and you swear your love's for me
I was crying over you
I am smiling I think of you
Misty mornings and water falls
Breathe in the air if you care, you compare, don't say farewell
Nothing can compare to when you roll the dice and you swear your love's for me
Nothing can compare to when you roll the dice and you swear your love's for me
Virtuous sensibility
Escape velocity
Nothing can compare to when you roll the dice and you swear your love's for me
Nothing can compare to when you roll the dice and you swear your love's for me
Breathe in the air if you care, you compare, don't say farewell...
******************************
2 very sweet & gentle girls approached and invited me to join their bible study group so they can share how meaningful life is.
We have a soul and life doesn't just end here, she said...
I said I'm okay & thanked them for sharing.
I couldn't even begin to explain what I have fathom since I became aware...
Or rather, since the idea of Jesus who died on the the cross, didn't.
I figured it's not in my place to judge but I do have the sneaky habit of hitting where it might hurt.
Or so I think...
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Resident Evil : Extinction
It's been...
1 month since besty left for L.A.
20 days since I quit ASIN.
1 week since Granny's passing.
Only, why does all these seem like such an exaggeratingly long time ago?
Starfish has just started on his PHD. And already I'm so proud of him I could cry just thinking about it.
Sometimes I wish I was half as determined and passionate as he is.
Inception was such a mind blasting movie we haven't had any mood to watch any new movies.
I'm happy. With myself and how things are moving along.
Just need a little getting used to.
*********************************************************
Verve Pipe - Never Let You Down
I'm trying to keep my feet on the ground
I'm getting to like this feeling I've found
I'm getting to love
The thought of having you around
And I will never let you down
Your friends are well-meaning
When they said, no-one is good enough for you
But if they play with your emotions
Dismiss the notion
And do what you have to do
Cause people don't take chances with their hearts
Since I met you I have past the hardest part
So remember one thing
I will never let you down
I'm trying to keep my feet on the ground
I'm getting to like this feeling I've found
I'm getting to love
The thought of having you around
And I will never let you down
Sometimes you feel defeated
But it's OK
You're not the only one
And all the complications
Bad situations happen to everyone
It doesn't matter how it ended or began
Sometimes the best that you can do is change your plans
I hope you understand that
I will never let you down
I'm trying to keep my feet on the ground
I'm getting to like this feeling I've found
I'm getting to love
The thought of having you around
And I will never let you down...
*************************************************
1 month since besty left for L.A.
20 days since I quit ASIN.
1 week since Granny's passing.
Only, why does all these seem like such an exaggeratingly long time ago?
Starfish has just started on his PHD. And already I'm so proud of him I could cry just thinking about it.
Sometimes I wish I was half as determined and passionate as he is.
Inception was such a mind blasting movie we haven't had any mood to watch any new movies.
I'm happy. With myself and how things are moving along.
Just need a little getting used to.
*********************************************************
Verve Pipe - Never Let You Down
I'm trying to keep my feet on the ground
I'm getting to like this feeling I've found
I'm getting to love
The thought of having you around
And I will never let you down
Your friends are well-meaning
When they said, no-one is good enough for you
But if they play with your emotions
Dismiss the notion
And do what you have to do
Cause people don't take chances with their hearts
Since I met you I have past the hardest part
So remember one thing
I will never let you down
I'm trying to keep my feet on the ground
I'm getting to like this feeling I've found
I'm getting to love
The thought of having you around
And I will never let you down
Sometimes you feel defeated
But it's OK
You're not the only one
And all the complications
Bad situations happen to everyone
It doesn't matter how it ended or began
Sometimes the best that you can do is change your plans
I hope you understand that
I will never let you down
I'm trying to keep my feet on the ground
I'm getting to like this feeling I've found
I'm getting to love
The thought of having you around
And I will never let you down...
*************************************************
Sunday, July 18, 2010
Sunday, July 11, 2010
Prince of Persia / Despicable Me / Toy Story 3
To rid the pettiness of the environment seemed too naive a task.
Life has taken a step back. I'm back to where I was 4 months ago. This time, a different choice made.
My priorities has always been the same. But for some reason, somehow along the way, distractions veered me off track and I start focusing on things that don't mean any more important. My energy drained and I couldn't care less.
I get anxiety attacks all day long because I lose track (and energy) of things I need to take care of.
I'm tired. I'm not fitting in. And I refuse to.
The besty is leaving for L.A. soon. I don't know what I'll do. I haven't thought about it. Don't really want to.
But I know I'm happy seeing how the fairy tale worked out. Happily ever after has only just begun.
As for me, empowering as I feel, vulnerability isn't far off.
Life has taken a step back. I'm back to where I was 4 months ago. This time, a different choice made.
My priorities has always been the same. But for some reason, somehow along the way, distractions veered me off track and I start focusing on things that don't mean any more important. My energy drained and I couldn't care less.
I get anxiety attacks all day long because I lose track (and energy) of things I need to take care of.
I'm tired. I'm not fitting in. And I refuse to.
The besty is leaving for L.A. soon. I don't know what I'll do. I haven't thought about it. Don't really want to.
But I know I'm happy seeing how the fairy tale worked out. Happily ever after has only just begun.
As for me, empowering as I feel, vulnerability isn't far off.
Sunday, May 16, 2010
KickAss / Iron Man 2
So it's come to the point where I'm dying to state the obvious.
I'm no saint. So I hang on to the good people I've come to treasure and steer clear of the cynics and the selfish.
I love you good people.
I'm no saint. So I hang on to the good people I've come to treasure and steer clear of the cynics and the selfish.
I love you good people.
Friday, April 02, 2010
Alice in The Wonderland
Ever since I started doing corporate hours, I realized the problem with unruly management is that there is just too much pettiness in the world.
The insecurities of a manager causing tension between staff by their unnecessarily condescending tone. The irresponsible comments made by the one who calls all shots stirring the misunderstanding sort of disrespect.
The managerial position is a very difficult place to hold. They had obligations to suck up to people they themselves don't fancy. They're in a position where every letter of their word counts.
We hang on to these words like our life depends on it.
I absolutely refuse to hang on to any of anyone's words. So much so that I am willing to give the benefit the doubt to the Low-EQ lot. Though it did take a whole load of my ego. I'm starting to feel like the smile is cramping up on my mouth.
I'm no saint. I'm as petty as everyone else. I just get so tired of the barbaric mess that I didn't wanna get sucked into it. So I make jokes and laugh and earned myself the "cute" label which I seem to have come to terms with it.
It's laborious. Having to deal with these 5 and a half days a week, 8 hours a day for the rest of my working life.
And what's worst, is when you thought you could shake all these off once you step out of the vacinity, the one person who could make you forget all the pettiness, isn't there for you.
The one person you need to hear or hug from. The one person you married.
I am this close to hurling that Willier and all the others out.
The insecurities of a manager causing tension between staff by their unnecessarily condescending tone. The irresponsible comments made by the one who calls all shots stirring the misunderstanding sort of disrespect.
The managerial position is a very difficult place to hold. They had obligations to suck up to people they themselves don't fancy. They're in a position where every letter of their word counts.
We hang on to these words like our life depends on it.
I absolutely refuse to hang on to any of anyone's words. So much so that I am willing to give the benefit the doubt to the Low-EQ lot. Though it did take a whole load of my ego. I'm starting to feel like the smile is cramping up on my mouth.
I'm no saint. I'm as petty as everyone else. I just get so tired of the barbaric mess that I didn't wanna get sucked into it. So I make jokes and laugh and earned myself the "cute" label which I seem to have come to terms with it.
It's laborious. Having to deal with these 5 and a half days a week, 8 hours a day for the rest of my working life.
And what's worst, is when you thought you could shake all these off once you step out of the vacinity, the one person who could make you forget all the pettiness, isn't there for you.
The one person you need to hear or hug from. The one person you married.
I am this close to hurling that Willier and all the others out.
Monday, March 01, 2010
Jumanji / The Ruins / The Fast and the Furious / Majide (Japanese gameshow) / Interview with a Vampire / Pursuit of Happiness
Everything about Bangkok feels like a sleazefest. I don't want to be judgemental, but it's hard not to when every where you turn, there are these ang mohs strutting around as if they own the sois. These men who are either cheating on their wives or not having some sort of goals in life except to have some cheap crude sexual fantasies fulfilled.
I dunno who ruined it for Bangkok. The Thais themselves or these ang mohs.
Imagine walking down Orchard Road and seeing mothers with children beggars, cabbies waiting to rip you off... It's disturbing.
All these makes me want to learn more about the situations in Bangkok.
I admit there had been some stereotypical thoughts going in my head before this trip. But I had always thought it couldn't be worst than what's in my head. And then I saw, and fell sick. Literally. The air was so bad I couldn't stop coughing.
Bangkok is moving too fast for it's own good. It's got luxury malls surrounded by unhygienic food carts, flea markets looking to rip off values beyond its quality, and the beggars had me feeling skepticism rather than sympathy.
I know life is hard, least to say trying to lead a life in poverty in a third world country. I pray and hope for the authorities to do what's best for their people rather than for their own benefit.
I've seen what I've thought, and I honestly didn't like it one bit. But it did remind me that I'm in a much better place than they are and therefore any rights to complain, isn't mine.
I dunno who ruined it for Bangkok. The Thais themselves or these ang mohs.
Imagine walking down Orchard Road and seeing mothers with children beggars, cabbies waiting to rip you off... It's disturbing.
All these makes me want to learn more about the situations in Bangkok.
I admit there had been some stereotypical thoughts going in my head before this trip. But I had always thought it couldn't be worst than what's in my head. And then I saw, and fell sick. Literally. The air was so bad I couldn't stop coughing.
Bangkok is moving too fast for it's own good. It's got luxury malls surrounded by unhygienic food carts, flea markets looking to rip off values beyond its quality, and the beggars had me feeling skepticism rather than sympathy.
I know life is hard, least to say trying to lead a life in poverty in a third world country. I pray and hope for the authorities to do what's best for their people rather than for their own benefit.
I've seen what I've thought, and I honestly didn't like it one bit. But it did remind me that I'm in a much better place than they are and therefore any rights to complain, isn't mine.
Sunday, February 21, 2010
The Invention of Lying / Sleeping Beauty
Where the Sun rises in the East.
It was incredible. Awesome. And right now, since being back for about 2 weeks, I've been having some serious withdrawal symptoms.
All the temples visiting made it a very spiritual trip. But even that aside, the culture, so strong and respectful, gave me a wider perspective of the Japanese. It was a civilization. An overworked society, but so cultured. It was all pride and quality. Pride upon their own beliefs. It was almost as if they were not judgemental, unless you give them a reason so unethical.
Disney Tokyo was lovely and there, I felt and tasted snow for the first time. It was. . . as I'd heard a Japanese girl saying, "kawaii".
NIKKO was a little too cold even for Starfish. Our stay at NIKKO INN was a tad incredulous starting with Starfish having to check-in at the under renovated reception which resembled an interrogation room (with a single orange light bulb hanging from the ceiling, a wooden table and a chair) and the small, palm sized TV in the living room, and last but not the least, especially to Starfish's horror, we had to make our own futon beds.
I get the feeling that's why Starfish fell sick. LOL.
All in all, a return trip is a must. Maybe sometime in spring, when the sakura blooms and the weather doesn't kill.
It was incredible. Awesome. And right now, since being back for about 2 weeks, I've been having some serious withdrawal symptoms.
All the temples visiting made it a very spiritual trip. But even that aside, the culture, so strong and respectful, gave me a wider perspective of the Japanese. It was a civilization. An overworked society, but so cultured. It was all pride and quality. Pride upon their own beliefs. It was almost as if they were not judgemental, unless you give them a reason so unethical.
Disney Tokyo was lovely and there, I felt and tasted snow for the first time. It was. . . as I'd heard a Japanese girl saying, "kawaii".
NIKKO was a little too cold even for Starfish. Our stay at NIKKO INN was a tad incredulous starting with Starfish having to check-in at the under renovated reception which resembled an interrogation room (with a single orange light bulb hanging from the ceiling, a wooden table and a chair) and the small, palm sized TV in the living room, and last but not the least, especially to Starfish's horror, we had to make our own futon beds.
I get the feeling that's why Starfish fell sick. LOL.
All in all, a return trip is a must. Maybe sometime in spring, when the sakura blooms and the weather doesn't kill.
Friday, January 22, 2010
Detroit Metal City
“Go to DMC! Go to DMC! Go to DMC!”
I’m freezing in Trioon right now. I couldn’t blog live. So I had to save in Word Document.
I realized, the whole blatantly-ignoring or staring-back with such uncomprehensive respond as if I’ve just said something foreign, isn’t just an Asian thing. I just had one Caucasian did that to me. Then again, maybe English was foreign to her.
I’ve said it. I’ve quit the Springers and will be serving sympathy notice till my Japan trip. I was feeling a huge amount of relief at first. The relief of not having to deal with being short changed amongst other repulsive behaviour. Then again who am I to judge. It IS their business.
So I’m moving on to something that pays better with better career prospect.
Today, for some reason, I felt this rush of sadness when I thought about the fact that I’ll be leaving the Springers soon. I’m not sure whether Olivia’s coo-ing instigated this unsupposed sadness, or am I actually sad AND worried about that fact that I might not be able to find a job before my Japan trip.
Doesn’t help that I’m constipated. Literally.
I’m freezing in Trioon right now. I couldn’t blog live. So I had to save in Word Document.
I realized, the whole blatantly-ignoring or staring-back with such uncomprehensive respond as if I’ve just said something foreign, isn’t just an Asian thing. I just had one Caucasian did that to me. Then again, maybe English was foreign to her.
I’ve said it. I’ve quit the Springers and will be serving sympathy notice till my Japan trip. I was feeling a huge amount of relief at first. The relief of not having to deal with being short changed amongst other repulsive behaviour. Then again who am I to judge. It IS their business.
So I’m moving on to something that pays better with better career prospect.
Today, for some reason, I felt this rush of sadness when I thought about the fact that I’ll be leaving the Springers soon. I’m not sure whether Olivia’s coo-ing instigated this unsupposed sadness, or am I actually sad AND worried about that fact that I might not be able to find a job before my Japan trip.
Doesn’t help that I’m constipated. Literally.
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